Monday, June 30, 2014

Very random post for the last day of June.

This post will have absolutely no rhyme or reason to it. If you are looking for something deep, please refer to the archives which are occasionally peppered with deepness.

So. Where to begin?

Let's start with my Newton running shoes. They make me happy inside when I put them on. And make me want to run. I sort of feel like I'm cheating on my Brooks but oh well. They were feeling super clunky and I made the mistake of going into the Highland Runners shop where they are Newton crazy. I tried them on and immediately got sucked in. Yup. How could I resist those bizarre lug thingies on the bottom? And, I mean, how could I not fall prey to fun little hashtags like #lugitout and #hellobetter? I'm just sayin'.

I'll periodically return to these guys, though. They've been good to me, albeit clunky.

Dude. I need to discuss The Democratic National Committee for a minute. Or rather the SPAMOcratic National Committee. Maaaaaan, look. I love me some DNC, some Barack, some wild Joe, and, of course, some Big Bill. But LAWD HAVE MERCY! Am I the only one receiving seven hundred and fifty trillion emails from them each hour?


Then they come all inconspicuous like it's from one of the homies. Like "Hey Kimberly. What's up, girl?" So I'm halfway through the email before I realize it's another $3 appeal. And I'm saying. I think the whole thing is genius and I do click the $3 give button every time. But I think whenever you do it alerts the DNC to send you an exponential increase in emails. And I'm saying, Mr. President. You know I love you. But y'all need to pump the brakes just a wee bit.

And yes. I know there was drama in the Supreme Court with Obamacare. But I still would be cool with like only four emails per hour instead of four hundred. Has this been happening to y'all? Let me know if it's just me.

Speaking of healthcare. . .

A man told me he wanted to "just cut out sugar" for three months instead of taking insulin for his rip-roaring and not-EVEN borderline diabetes. He also refused pills. And I explained that "sugar" is about more than sugar. But he wasn't having it.

So then I told him he wouldn't be able to get erections.


Insulin: One month supply. Refills: 6.

Mmm hmmm.

I've been eating like a crazy person lately. Lots of social events and lots of excuses on my end. I keep allowing a bunch of carbs because I've been running. But not like ULTRA marathons or anything. So really, I've been tripping. Stepped on the scale and it told me that I needed to scale it on back. And so I shall. Why? Because every good internist knows that you can't out run a big behind while eating a crappy diet. Real talk.

Speaking of real talk:

Me:  Babe, do I look like I may have gained a couple?

BHE: (smiling) A couple of what?

Me: Dude. Pounds.

BHE: Uhhh. Yes.

Me: Wait, huh? Did you say 'YES.'

BHE:  Yes.

Me: Yes you said 'yes?' 

BHE: Yes. And Yes.

Me: Damn.

BHE: You asked. 

This is my pedicure I got while in Los Angeles. Every time I'm out there, I get one of these--for the story more than anything else. I mean. . . . who can resist the option to get "the busy toe?" Not me, man. This woman that JoLai goes to religiously (though not always for a "busy toe") literally knocked it out by hand in like ten minutes. And I swear it cost only $22. But here's what's awesome about it. It's the universal conversation piece across all races, ages, cultures and socioeconomic levels. I ain't even exaggerating. 

Case in point:


Fortysomething soccer mom in Publix:  "Oh my goodness! Your toes are so FUN!"

Me: *fake smile*  (Have I told you about how I think "fun" is NEVER a compliment?)


Eclectic older hippie white grandmama at Trader Joes:  "Wow! What a cool pedicure! So artistic."

Me:  "Oh. Yeah! Thanks! I got it in Los Angeles".

Hippie Lady: (head almost on my foot) "Such a remarkable use of color. Beautiful. Now that is cool!"

Me: "Hey thanks!"

She was pretty damn cool, too.


Youngish guy in a Midtown restaurant wearing lipstick and skinny jeans: "YAAAAAAAASSSSSS, baby! Them toes is giving me LIFE, chile. LIIIIIIFE! (*snaps fingers in a circle*) YAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSS, honey! Yes LAWD!!"

(That was the whole conversation.)

By the way--I am not a big fan of Nene from the Housewives. But I do love a good Nene gif, man. Ha.


Resident's wife at intern welcome dinner:  "What an amazing pedicure! I love it!"

Me: "Thank you!"

Res wife: "How did they do that?"

Me: "By hand. And super quick, too."

Resident's wife: "So, so awesome. Wow. Just amazing."


Two year old at the car wash: "I like you toes."

Me; "Awww. Thanks, sweetie."


Teenaged sista in the beauty supply shop:  "Girrrrrl! You DID that! Them toes is HOT TO DEATH! Where you got that did at?"

Me:  "In L.A."

Teenaged sista: (lips all curled): "MMMMM hmmmmm. That's hot. I knew that wadn't here. That's that new-new. That fly Cali shit. And what it cost. Like ten dollars, right?"

Me: "Well. Close. Like twenty two." 

Teenaged sista:  "WHETT? (that's supposed to be "what") Twenty two dollars? Mmmmm. My homegirl? She stay off a Crenshaw and she get hers for only like ten, sometime fifteen an'nat's it. AND she get some lashes. "

Me: "Oh yeah? Lashes, too?"

Teenaged sista: "Yup. Sho do."

Me:  "Hmmmm. Hey. . .miss? Do you think my toes look . . uh. .  fun?"

Teenaged sista:  "Whett?" 

Me: "Oh nothing."

She said that like I didn't grow up right off of Crenshaw. C'mon, boo-boo. Ain't NO pedis jumping off for $10 unless they are being done on my front porch by Isaiah and Zachary. I don't care WHET you say.

How random is this? Ran a 5K a couple of weeks ago and when I got my number, I saw that my brother's veterinary practice was one of the big baller platinum sponsors. I was so excited that couldn't stop telling people at the race. Most of whom I didn't know since I went alone. 

Woo hoo!

My brother has like totally arrived. 

What else?

Oh, this.

I asked this patient to do something just because. She said no.


What's up with Robin Thicke begging his wife back on national television through song? I am kind of over it. I mean, they were high school sweethearts so I'm sort of rooting for them to reconcile. But can he like get a room please? And by a room I mean like one with just her in it and not me?


Hey. More excitement! I'd been stalking this Morehouse resident because her car had both a TUSKEGEE and MEHARRY alumni sticker on it. And she's a Delta, too, I think. But I didn't recognize the car so would leave notes on it all the time. With no reply. 

Maaaaan. What's that about? Well. I finally meet her and she's super sweet. So I let her off the hook. Plus she's a busy resident who was surely wondering what crazy lady kept leaving ripped scraps of paper on her windshield.

Family dinner with Small Group Delta! They've finished year one. They're legit second years now. Imagine that.

I'm getting over a summer cold. Summer colds suck. Wait. What even IS a summer cold? Remind me to ask a doctor.

Hey! Isaiah lost a tooth at Grandpa's. Zack told me on the phone and let me know that his Grandpa would leave a dollar under the pillow while his brother was sleeping. You know. "Just like you guys do." Well so much for that.


Me: Babe. Does my hair look a little funny today?

BHE:  When do you get it done?

Me: That's not the question.

BHE: Okay. Yes.

Me: Damn, bro!

What else? Oh. Yes. The BET Music Awards was yesterday. I so cannot wait to go to the hair salon just to hear them talk about it. It's going to be awesome. I have all of my talk points ready. Seriously. I do. Which includes my BOO HISS Chris Brown soap box and how I want to throw a very, very ripe tomato at him. (Even if I find his music entertaining.)

Guess what? My niece Gabby is in New York dancing with the Alvin Ailey Dance Theater. Seriously? Seriously. I'm insanely proud. Yup.

I had some pivotal encounters in clinic today. One in particular I'm still letting marinate in my head. Tears were involved. For both patient and provider. 

Lady at restaurant: "I love your hair."

Me: "Thanks."

Lady: "So fun!"


That's all I got. What's on your mind these days? Anything fun?

Happy Monday. #hellobetter


  1. I love your pedicure. I think it's awesome. I also think it's awesome that the BHE tells you the truth, That way when he tells you that you look awesome you know he means it. I'm just not understanding what is so bad about "fun" other than it sounds like something that would come out of a teeny bopper's soccer mom's mouth on a play date.

    1. "Fun" suggests folly -- not fabulous - to me. Soccer moms call cute things "cute." They say fun when it's intriguing but not something they'd ever do -- and maybe not their teeny bopper daughter either. Ha ha ha. I prefer "fun" for, well, fun. Or anything other than me and how I look.

    2. Oh, I would so do that in a heart beat and wear open toed shoes around corporate America to show them off.

  2. I loved this post. I love randomness.
    And your toenail story in the Trader Joe's reminded me of something that happened to me in Publix a few months ago. A woman my age was trying to find something to eat on the fly. She was asking about sushi and I told her that our Publix doesn't have a sushi guy and then she was looking at the salmon and we were talking about that and she told me she was about to hit the road for a trip somewhere and anyway, ANYWAY, when we parted ways she told me, "Stay cool," which made me smile real big.

    1. I thought of you when I wrote that because that lady was cool and so are you. Stay cool, Sister Moon.

  3. I loved this post! I love your randomness, it feels like we are out for a girl's dinner or something (because in my head we are totally friends). I love your polish, so awesome. And I agree that "fun" can sound catty.

    Dude, I'm totally with you on Robin Thicke. I mean maybe he should've thought a little more before the whole Miley incident and he wouldn't have to beg and plead in public. I mean seriously.

    Hope your new running shoes are treating you well. I don't comment often because my ipad still doesn't like to work with your blog but I'm always reading! Can we get a new top ten? I love those things!

    -Christie Leveille

    1. So far so good with the runners. Although I felt like I was getting a bit of a blister yesterday which made me nervous. Top Ten coming very soon!

  4. What do you like about the Newtons? I'm a Nike girl myself but will go with the shoe that provides the most support. Just as you have delicate wrists, I have delicate ankles; a light jog is murder on my ankerbones.

    And the SPAMmail? I made the mistake of clicking on an Obama support link and before I could get to my email, they had sent 2 messages wanting to know why I hadn't donated yet. I'm like, I just clicked the link like 8 seconds ago, gah. Anyway, I have to treat them like I treat Pookie and June Bug: Don't call me; I'll call you.

    1. I like how they make my stride shorter. And they're lighter. And they're cute. Ha. I, too have the delicate ankle situation.

      Yes. I woke up to 200 emails from Barack today. He's stalking me. For reals.

  5. Love the toenails! I only get pedis in Cali - uber cheap.

    I cannot stand "fun" used like that. I find it to be derogatory. I was at a fundraiser once - the Mississippi Mass Choir was performing. A lady sidled up to me and said "I just love them. They are so FUN!" Um, please receive this side eye in the spirit it is being given and go away.

    1. I know, right? Fun always sounds weird. I guess it's fine for psychedelic toenail polish but not for my hair or for the doggone Mississippi Mass Choir. FUN? Blasphemy, I say!

  6. Oh- and I just remembered your part about getting all the emails from the Democrats and YES! Forty-five a minute. And I don't even hit the $ button any more. Ever. They will not stop and I'm about to get annoyed. Yes, pump the brakes, people! So very well put.

    1. They so need to be pumped. No more $3 giving for me.

  7. Love this! I run/walk in Brooks, also. Never heard of Newtons. I also don't understand why 'fun' is derogatory. *shrugs*

    1. I think it's okay from the ankle down to say "fun." But I don't want anyone to call my hair, my clothes or anything else "fun." Find another adjective, man. To me it always feels like a nice word for "quirky" or "weird." And if my intention is to be quirky or weird, I'd prefer that. But almost always when someone calls something "fun" that wasn't my intention (quirky or weird.) That's just me.

  8. I don't get DNC emails, but I DO think your toenails are "fun" as in, free spirit, not what everyone else does, I like them and don't care what you think kind of way. I understand your beef with the word but I still think they are cool, fun, make me happy to look at them. All that.

    1. Fun is okay nestled in with cool and happy. But a random, "OMG your hair is so fun?" *insert the Nene Leakes eye roll.*

  9. Those are some awesome toenails! On a completely different note, the wannabe doc in me laughed in that slightly warped way when I read how you brought it home to that diabetic dude by telling him if he didn't get it together he'd have quite a problem "getting it up". For the amount of diabetes I see every day in the records, that was a familiar premise. But it seems like if you make it something sex related, the comprehension of the guys goes to some primal level you can't reach with scientific information. T-minus 11 days until that 5K walk I signed up for...hopefully it won't be blisteringly hot like today was...

    1. Girrrrrrl, you know dudes like the nature to work as intended. Mmmm hmmmmm. That's always my ace in the hole for non adherent patients. "Sir, you won't' be able to get an erection." "What? Aww HELL new!"


"Tell me something good. . . tell me that you like it, yeah." ~ Chaka Khan

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