Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Just a (daydreaming) girl.


 "Hey, baby
let's get away
Let's go somewhere far . . . ."

~ Aretha Franklin

There's this thing that happens with Caribbean breezes. They blow away your worries and leave you with this clarity of thought that makes for some good daydreaming. This is how I brought in 2013. With friends, old and new, with laughter, with dancing, and with daydreams o' plenty. 

I would tell you of some of the dances my new friends taught me. But this here blog is a family blog and, you know, I'm not trying to offend anybody. Nope, not me. (Just know that Rihanna had better be glad that I'm forty-two and not twenty-two.) 

Mmmm hmmm.


Wait--what's that you ask? Oh, were the kids with us on this little island jaunt? Uhhh . . .yeah, that's a no. But we did think of them and talk about them quite a bit.

Mmmm hmmm.

Look, man. I'm glad that my parents both insisted that we take some time to be a couple away from our kids sometimes. They're a huge part of us feeling comfortable even leaving at all. Them telling us that this is necessary to do remains some of the best marital advice we've ever received.


There's something else that I get during these trips: A chance to see myself as simply a girl. Worrying not one bit about the parts that don't look the same as they did before children. And not worrying about looking silly whilst catching sandcrabs or screaming with delight when foamy waves roll over painted toes.


You know? I love my life. I love being a mother and a doctor and a grown-a@% woman. Really and truly, I do. But before all of those things, I was just a girl. During these times, I am reminded of that. I'm reminded that she's still in there and I get to see her plainly, clearly. That's hard to do sometimes with every day life--but I fight to keep her alive. I sure do.

Tounces kept the boys during our holiday getaway. And even though I thanked her profusely, I know she'll read this so I'll thank her again for affording us this time each year.

This year more than ever.

She said that since the boys are a bit older, they're easier. But she kept them when they weren't easy. She sure did. And I continue to be deeply, deeply appreciative of that.

But this year more than ever.

I needed to get in touch with that girl again. The one with very few cares or worries. That girl grew up near an ocean, too. She also grew up with laughter and sunshine and tranquil moments such as these. This year, connecting to that girl again connected me to Deanna (who I'm sure appreciated being in that hot sun only in spirit since she always was prone to prickly heat.)

Ha. The image of her and that prickly heat just made me smile.
It's 2013. And I'm doing just fine. Still loving and missing my older sister, yes. But hearing her telling me about all of the good things that happened in 2012 and to not let them get lost in that November. She'd suggest that I ponder my gifts and think of ways to use them even more. She would, so I will.

In fact, that's part of what I was daydreaming about.

Yeah, it's 2013. And you know what? It's going to be a great year.

Happy New Year, y'all.

First song of the new year on the mental iPod. . . . No Doubt singing "Just a Girl."

and Miss Aretha Franklin a close second with "Daydeaming" . . . .she SANGS this song. Yaaaassss!!!


  1. One of our first real trips without the kids was on my fortieth birthday... two years ago, yeah, what were we thinking. We've been making a point to do it more often, especially with the kids leaving. Cruise scheduled for end of Jan.! Glad you had a good time.

    1. YES! Do it, big girl! I can't believe that you're about to be empty nesters! Wow, T! Have a blast and don't make another Spencer on accident. Ha haha.

  2. Replies
    1. Dang! I should have taken a cab to 37 Paddington! :)

  3. Ah, it's so true. The Caribbean always delivers the girl back to the woman. For me, anyway, and I see for you too.
    It is a miracle of geography. It is a healing of the soul. It is a rearranging of the neurons. All of it.

    1. I know you know about that. We are lulled by those waters, aren't we? A miracle of geography indeed.

  4. Wow, you look so much like your mom in that picture. Beautiful. Happy vacation and Happy New Year!

  5. My ten year old self had her stuff together. What gave her joy, brings me joy still. I try to let her inform my adult self every day.

    1. That's awesome, Kirsten! Keep it going, sister!

  6. I promise to offer this to my kids when they have children. My husband and I did not have child care available when our children were small and I regret that. We should have hired someone but hindsight is 20/20 right?

    1. It always is. Your kids will be so appreciative. I sure am.

  7. I needed to get in touch with that girl again. The one with very few cares or worries. oo. She also grew up with laughter and sunshine and tranquil moments such as these

    What an awesome statement!!!! "I needed to get in touch with that girl again!" So powerful! From time to time life throws us some hard blows, where we loose sight. But, I have found being "intentional" with getting in touch with me is the best way to remain healthy all the way around!

    Thanks for sharing, and welcome back!
    Front Inc.

  8. I live vicariously through your sunny vacations...

    aka: the sister who is good for about 30 minutes in the sun. XOXO

    1. One sister with prickly heat and another with crazy sunburn prone skin. Sigh. What's up with you two? I think it's some kind of random gene that y'all got and I didn't.

      :) Happy New Year!

  9. Your writing about being a "girl," nearly makes my heart break. It's been so long -- forever, really -- that I've felt like one, and I want to feel like one, again.


"Tell me something good. . . tell me that you like it, yeah." ~ Chaka Khan

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