Wednesday, June 1, 2011

What the cell?

This week:

  • I saw a very obese gentleman pseudo-jogging down the street while attempting to talk on his cell phone. At the same time. Umm, it wasn't working so well.
  • I saw someone riding on one of those Vespa motorscooters while LOL-ing on their cell phone. Without the hands-free device.
  • I saw a lady pushing a stroller with a dog leash attached to it while also helping what appeared to be a five year-old child ride a bike with no training wheels. Oh yeah, while she was yacking on her cell phone. Also without the hands-free device.
  • I saw a dude smoking a cigarette outside of Grady gabbing-slash-puffing with his cell phone on one ear while texting on another cell phone sitting on his lap.
  • I saw a three year-old kid playing "Angry Birds" on somebody's cell phone. And periodically saying, "Yessss!"
  • I saw four people sitting at a table in a restaurant and all were on their cell phones. No one was talking or looking at each other.
  • I saw Oprah Winfrey herself driving down the street while texting on her cell phone. (Juuuust kidding. . . relax. . .)
  • I called my friend's cell phone and the message said, "Please do NOT leave me a message because I do NOT check messages on this phone. For real, I don't." I totally left a message.
  • I saw two girls updating and looking at their Facebook pages on their cell phones throughout an entire church service. 
  • I looked up something in the bible on my own cell phone during that same church service using the "Holy Bible" iPhone app. . . .as Harry gave me the hairiest eyeball ever.

  • I heard a patient tell me with a rather disgusting chuckle that he was watching "some pornos" on his cell phone after making the mistake of asking him "What's that you're watching?" He was like, "It's like YouTube, doc, but you know, all porno stuff."  Umm, yes. That would be T.M.I.
  • I saw a patient at Grady with his cell phone plugged into the wall in the clinic room. Oh, and he was talking on our "dial-nine-first" clinic phone and put up one finger mouthing to me, "Just one sec," when I walked in.

Wait. What the cell?

Happy Wednesday.


  1. Delurking to say that I love your blog, and also, yes. Yes, yes, yes - what is up with the cell phones? Am I the only one who remembers a time when there was one phone in your house, usually on the kitchen wall, and you'd get a tap in the back of the head when you stretched the cord as far as it would go trying to get a little privacy? Am I the only one on the planet that doesn't run panting like Pavlov's dog at the sound of a phone ringing? Am I the only one that can actually turn the ringers off on all my phones and still continue breathing? I appreciate the convenience of my cell phone, but I don't need to text while dining out with friends, in my doctor's office or any other time when it would be RUDE to ignore the person I'm with. The whole cell culture irks me. Okay, I'm done. Thanks for letting me get that off my chest.

  2. My favorite is the patient who was in the middle of a second opinion for a very advanced breast cancer who took a cell phone call and put up the one finger to indicate she would be finished in a minute. For real? A call is more important than hearing information that will affect your life??? Even your kids can be cared for by someone else for the 30 minutes or so that you are speaking with the doctor. I just shook my head, but the doctor walked out of the room and came back 40 minutes later, after seeing another patient. The cell phone patient was very annoyed at this, but saw nothing wrong with taking a call. Something is wrong. OK now I am done, too. thanks for letting me vent. :-)

  3. Okay, now I admit to loving the use of my iPhone, but, for real, not while I am jogging and not while I am trying to help my son ride a two-wheeler. For real.

    But confession: This one time Harry did catch me parallel parking with a phone on my shoulder. Just one time. But I was listening to my Dad tell me something about "the gouch" in his toe so it was important.

  4. I love bluetooth in the car. I must admit I get a lot done that way because I have a long horrible commute. I talk to lots of patients. Young people are insanely in-love with their phones and texting. Sometimes their thumbs fly so fast it is a blur. I'm still a hunt and peck.


"Tell me something good. . . tell me that you like it, yeah." ~ Chaka Khan

Related Posts with Thumbnails