|This one's for you, On Call RN. . . .|
They scowl and answer every single one of your questions with, "Wh-aat?"
They don't save you when you're getting ready to majorly screw up in front of the attending (unless of course it involves a patient's safety.) Otherwise, you're on your own. Oh yeah, and if they really hate you, they ask a question on rounds in front of the attending that they know 100% for sure that you don't have the foggiest notion how to answer. (Note: Usually involves dropped balls or screw ups on your part.)
They page you every hour on the hour between the hours of midnight at six A.M.
They don't offer you any of their food. (The nurses always have the best food--especially ICU nurses!)
They approach the attending or the fellow with all of their questions or suggestions instead of talking to you.
They approach the medical student with all of their questions and suggestions instead of talking to you.
They start off all conversations with you by saying the words, "Look, I'm not sure if you realize it, but. . . "
The nurses lounge gets quiet every time you enter.
The nurse stands there staring at your for thirty seconds after everything you say, kind of like you're stupid.
and . . .drum roll please. . . . the #1 way to know for sure that the nurses hate you. . . . . .
They tell you.
Pearl of wisdom from a doctor who has made good with the nurses:
Love thy nurses. Why? Because NURSE = butt-saver, hands-on-deck, extra-brain, person-who-remembers-next-step-in-a-code, shoulder-to-cry-on, cheerer-upper, differential-diagnosis-suggester, back-into-reality-smacker, team-mate-extraordinaire, knower-of-fine-details, wind-beneath-tired-wing, wingman-or-wingwoman, explainer-of-drips-that-you-are-clueless-about, teacher, and best of all, friend.
So here's to all the nurses. . . . . .and to those of us who work with them. May they always share their food with you and never hate your guts!