Showing posts with label Shel Silverstein. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Shel Silverstein. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

What remains.

*names and details changed to protect anonymity. . .yeah, yeah. . .you know the drill.
image from here


In Shel Silverstein's children's classic "The Giving Tree" he tells the story of a boy and his best friend, a tree. And though some people have real strong and sometimes negative feelings about the meaning behind this book--I mostly think the story is beautiful and selfless . . . .in that prodigal-son-kind-of-way, you know?

Kind of like many of the people who have given selflessly to me in my lifetime.


Anyways.

Early on, all that the tree has to offer the boy is obvious--outstretched branches for shade from the summer, sprawling limbs to climb, and ripe, juicy apples to eat. But later in that book the boy grows older. Eventually as an older man, the boy comes to the tree, who is now a stump.  At this point the tree feels convinced that he doesn't have what the boy is looking for but as it turns out his request is simple and doable; he wanted a place to sit.

Aaaaaah. 

My children are only six and four, so they generally need me for most things. I often wonder what things will be like when they grow older, and then secretly cross my fingers behind my back hoping they will always need me (but in that gainfully employed, fully independent kind of way, of course.) Just when I start to worry, I think of how much my parents have had to offer me in my adulthood and breathe a sigh of relief. And I tell myself of Isaiah and Zachary--of course, they'll need me.  Of course they will.

But raising up doctors is different. Especially resident doctors. They come to you as clinical babies, cooing and sometimes crying. Over those three to four years you stand behind them as they take their first steps, applaud their every achievement, place band-aids on their boo-boos, and offer tough love and redirection when they make mistakes.  Their learning trajectory is fast and furious, and one day, when you least expect it, they're just as tall as you.  Some even taller.

And so they grow. You sit across from them in clinic or stroll the wards on rounds realizing that your shoulders are at the same level. They speak of things cutting edge that just maybe you haven't heard yet and pull out electronics that perhaps you've never even seen. They prove to be responsible drivers so you let them drive sometimes without you, and when you do get in the passenger seat, you find yourself surprised at how well they can maneuver a five speed without your two cents. 

So you wonder. What can I do?  You've climbed my limbs and basked in my shade. What can I do?

Today I am reflecting on something that recently reminded me of the answer to that question.

image credit



Grady Hospital Primary Care Clinic, Spring 2011

"Okay, so we'll see how things go with diet and exercise in terms of his blood pressure. I think he's pretty motivated to work on shedding a few pounds."

"Didn't you say he had diabetes?" I asked with my eyes squinted.  With diabetes and a blood pressure reading of 161/94, "diet and exercise" didn't sound like the best game plan. At all.

I was slightly surprised considering who I was talking to. This resident was in the last half of his final year of training and usually gave such pristine patient presentations that I'd find myself grasping for teaching points. With some of our strongest trainees in the latter portions of their residencies, finding something to "teach" or "correct" can be downright intimidating. But this? This was odd.  And hearing this guy say that someone with diabetes and such poorly controlled hypertension should simply move more and eat less--without any medication changes--didn't quite make sense.

He sighed and looked down at the ink pen twirling nervously in his hand. "I know, Dr. M. But this guy?" He sighed again and chose his words carefully. "I mean, he's just. . .I mean he's totally against being put on more medication. I mean. . .and he's such a great patient. . .like. . .he really takes an interest in what's going on with his body. I just. . .I don't know. . .I just want to respect his wish and see what we can do without adding new medication that's all."

I stared at him and nodded slowly. My eyes then darted back over to the monitor displaying the patient's electronic medical record.  A few mouse clicks later and it was quickly confirmed that a conservative approach had been taken to his blood pressure at the last visit.  "Wow. His blood pressure wasn't controlled at this visit either." I scrolled downward and then brought up a page trending his blood pressures. Initially "borderline" but for the last two encounters, officially uncontrolled.

Next I moved to the page with lab values. Highlighted in bright red was one abnormal result--the patient's kidney function. I winced and peeked back at  my resident with an eyebrow raised.

"I know," he whispered. My resident pressed his lips together and shook his head.

I leaned my elbow on the counter and rested my chin in my hand. Keeping my eyes on him I said exactly what was on my mind. "Okay, I'm confused. What's going on?"

Because something was going on. This resident was an all-star. I was 100% certain that he knew the specific guidelines and the exact literature on management of high blood pressure in patients with diabetes and kidney disease. In fact, at this point he more than likely knew these kinds of details even better than me, his supervisory attending. So the question was simple. What was going on?

He shrugged his shoulders. "Dr. M? I need some help with this. Like help communicating," he finally said. "I mean. . .this patient is super nice, like I said. . .but so opinionated and firm in his resolve, you know? Like he's taking notes and asking questions and. . . it's hard to explain."

I nodded and waited for him to try.

"I think I want to. . . .like. . .I think it might help me to watch you talk to him. What I want to do is add a second medication.  He's maxed on an ACE inhibitor and I'd really like to add a calcium channel blocker. I mean, honestly? His cholesterol is slightly over goal, too, but I didn't even touch that today. I just didn't know how. He's not angry or difficult or anything. Just. . . .determined. I need help with this, Dr. M. Can I just watch you talk to him?"

And no, he wasn't throwing me under the bus. This all-star senior resident who could recite journals like the alphabet and conjure up obscure facts like a computer was asking me to teach him something. And it felt wonderful. Like that way I suppose parents feel when their kids are blossoming adolescents or savvy young adults but still come back for help with something simple. Or like in The Giving Tree when the boy just wanted to sit on the stump and that was it.

Watch me? Watch me talk to your patient and that's it?

And so I did my best to conceal the tiny wave of emotion that rolled over me and said, "Okay. I can try."



Mr. McCutcheon

When we came into Mr. McCutcheon's room, he immediately stood in deference. "Good morning, doctor!"

"Oh my," I laughed, "You don't have to stand!"

I liked his firm hand shake and pleasant demeanor.  My resident leaned against the sink as I initiated encounter.  With Mr. McCutcheon's permission, I repeated a few key elements of the examination and then gestured for him to sit down across from me.  The first thing I noticed on the desk was a neat stack of colorful papers.

"What is this, sir?" I inquired.

He turned two of the sheets around to face me.  One was a computerized graph of his blood sugars which had been beautifully controlled.  The other was just as colorful and consisted of two months worth of blood pressure readings, all averaging somewhere between 140's and 160's systolic (top number) and 80's to high 90's diastolic (bottom number.)

"This is amazing."  I said that because it was amazing.  I decided then to cut to the chase. "Mr. McCutcheon, sir, it's my understanding that you and your doctor have been trying to avoid adding more medications."

"Correct.  I lost four pounds since the last visit, and just started a walking club a few months back. I cut out bread and it's been going well. I am pretty sure I can do without another medication if I keep this up."  His face was still pleasant and just like my resident said, motivated.  Nothing about him was confrontational or difficult. Just. . . determined.

"I see."  I picked up the sheet with the blood pressure readings on it, and beneath that was a piece of notebook paper with a few notes he'd taken.  "I'd bet you were a good student during your school days."

"You know, Dr. Manning? I just always loved learning. Always.  School didn't come easy to me, but I always tried hard, you know?  My mama always said that I was hungry to learn."  He chuckled a bit, which made the redundant folds on his chin shake a little.

"Okay, Mr. McCutcheon. . . well that gives me an idea on how we can proceed."  He looked a little puzzled for a moment, but mostly intrigued.  I pulled out my pen and grabbed a sheet of blank paper. He scooted up his chair and craned his neck to show that he was fully engaged.  "What I want to do is talk about your visit as I would to another doctor or a medical student. Is that okay?"

His face lit up as he nodded in the affirmative. He reached for a steno pad out of his bag in case he needed to take more notes which warmed my heart.

And so the lesson started. First I explained to him the classifications for hypertension or high blood pressure. I wrote at the top of the paper--PRE-HYPERTENSION, STAGE I HYPERTENSION and STAGE 2 HYPERTENSION. "Once the top number or systolic is consistently160 or more, this is stage 2. And the thing I always remember about stage 2 is that 'two means two.'"

"What does that mean?" Mr. M stopped from his notetaking to ask.

"It basically means that if you have stage 2 hypertension, you almost always will need at least two medications to treat it." He nodded to show me that he was with me. "Okay, but now here's a more tricky part. You have diabetes, sir. Your last lab work also showed that your kidneys have weakened just a little bit--not so much that it is terribly alarming--but it's something we need to pay attention to. Were you aware of this?"

"Yes, ma'am, my doctor told me. Does that mean dialysis or what does that mean?"

"No, it definitely isn't at that point. See, we look at this test called the creatinine. It's something your body breaks down from muscle and your kidneys should be able to filter it out. We check the blood to see the level of the creatinine and if it creeps up, we know that filter is off some. Your number was 1.6. It really should be under 1.4.  Since we know that diabetes and high blood pressure affect your kidneys, experts recommend that we get pretty hard core when it comes to getting blood pressure down in people with both diabetes and kidneys that are getting weaker. We call the weaker kidneys 'nephropathy.'"

"Like a nephron, right? A kidney cell?"

"Exactly, sir. Exactly." I drew in a sigh and continued.  In block numbers I wrote a 140 and a 130 on the sheet with a big arrow next to the 130.  "In people without diabetes, we want to see the top number under 140.  But in people with diabetes and especially with diabetic nephropathy, that number needs to be even lower." I drew an 'x' over the 140 and circled the 130.

"Like under 130?"

I nodded.  From there I even launched into cholesterol guidelines and how they relate to heart disease prevention in diabetics and simple things like taking a daily aspirin. Mr. McCutcheon hung onto every word and yes, his mama was right--he was hungry to learn it all. "So here's what I need you to do for me.  With the student doctors and resident doctors, this is the point where I ask them to tell me what should be the next step in the treatment plan. I want you to take a second to look at your notes. Then look over this blood pressure graph you brought in, your cholesterol level and at your medications. Now what I want you to do for me is tell me how you would manage yourself as a patient if you were the doctor--not based on what you want, but now that you know what you know. You are the doctor trying to prevent a patient from getting worsening kidney function or heart disease."

And you can guess what happened next. Mr. McCutcheon obliged me--big time.  Over the next three minutes, he looked over those notes and jotted things down on his paper. He circled things and drew arrows and scratched the side of his head.  Finally, I playfully told him that his time was up.

"Okay, doc, tell me how you have assessed this patient and what you plan to do for him." We both smiled, feeling connected during our little role play.

My was he a great sport.  Mr. McCutcheon broke everything down and then some. He told me that his 'patient' had stage 2 hypertension, yet was only on one agent.  He explained that 'two means two' and that although the patient was reluctant to do so, the right thing to do was add another medicine. Then he added that if the patient continued losing weight, that maybe we could revisit it. Genius! Next he told me that having 'sugar' is like having had a heart attack before so the cholesterol level needs to be lower.  "The LDL," he said firmly, "and just remember that the 'L' stands for 'lousy' because that's the bad one."

I glanced up at my resident for the first time during the encounter whose face was painted with a big, proud smile.  Mr. McCutcheon recommended that in addition to the daily aspirin to protect the patient's heart that it's time for us to go ahead and get him on some cholesterol medication, too.  But of course, if he keeps losing weight, we could revisit that, too.

And so, that's exactly what we did. We followed every one of Mr. McCutcheon's recommendations and he willingly accepted them all.  It was one of the greatest patient-doctor communication moments I've had in a very long time.

When clinic ended that day, my resident pulled me to the side. "Thank you so much for taking all that time with Mr. McCutcheon, Dr. Manning.  You have no idea how much I learned.  But you know what? I always learn something when we work together."

You do?  


See? The person who criticized "The Giving Tree" missed the point. They misunderstood it all, thinking that the tree gave and gave but got nothing in return. . . .

Au contraire, mon frère.

Yes. There's something in it for us. We are more than just old stumps . . . and no matter how much time goes by, our branches are still sprawling and fit for climbing whether we realize it or not.

***
Happy Tuesday. May you, too, be a giver that takes the time to also recognize the gift.

***

Oh yeah, and if after all that you are still feeling like reading-slash-goofing off-slash-not studying-slash-not working-slash-whatever important thing you are supposed to be doing instead of reading my ramblings, you might enjoy this post from last year (full of more ramblings) on "The Gospel According to Shel Silverstein." ('Cause I love me some Shel Silverstein, y'all.)

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Holding Out and Pickin' Switches

SkippyJon Jones
 we heart SkippyJon at our house

Today:
  • Isaiah had a "good listening" day. Yaaay!
  • Zachary had a "not-so-good listening" day. Booo!
  • Isaiah earned a special treat today for staying on task and getting a good report.
  • Zachary lost privileges like: "playing on your i-Patch" or "watching 'lectric company."
  • They live in the same house.
 (child using an i-Patch: quite the coveted pre-school activity these days)

Yesterday:
  • The exact opposite of that took place.
  • Privileges for Zachary, loss of privileges for Isaiah.
  • Ugggh
Sidebar:
  • My dad, who put the "old" in "old school", is reading this saying, "I got yo' LOSS of PRIVILEGES ALRIGHT!" 
  • (If you are interpreting this to mean that Pa Pa believes in a good ol' fashioned "butt-whoopin'" you are 100% accurate in that assumption.)
  • Dad and I recently concluded that "butt-whoopins" are only effective when one fully commits to the activity. (Canoodling or falling onto the floor giggling and playing tickle-torture mid-spanking do not count. Nor is this approach recommended.)
  • I do not commit well to the aforementioned because of the canoodling/tickle-torture reason, so must resort to other forms of punishment.
  • This just in: Pa Pa now has eyebrows raised and is saying, "Since when does a KID get any privileges? Yo' privilege is to do what I say." (Love that my kids have an old school granddad.)

Questions (to which I do welcome answers):
  • How do you allow a five-year old to have fun in the same house/room/space as a 3-year-and-363-day old who is supposed to have lost privileges?
  • Why does it feel like I'm being punished when I have to restrict either of them from the kinds of fun activities that give me two minutes to breathe? Uggghh.
What ended up happening:
  • Nobody watched any TV either night. (Too hard to allow one and not the other.)
  • Nobody played on the i-Patch. (They had run the battery down anyway.)
  • I needed to figure out a consequence.
  • Ah hah! I pulled out the heavy artillery:
    • "Where the Sidewalk Ends" by Shel Silverstein. Yeah baby. Zachy went to bed while we read poems of Isaiah's choice. OMG. Mayhem, I tell you.
    • The night before: Isaiah had to go to bed and missed out on Zachary and I reading two "SkippyJon Jones" books.  Two.
Verdict:
  • Okay. I'm slightly ashamed that I have resorted to holding out on books as a punishment. But.
  • I do think (if she just allowed me the chance to explain it) that Oprah would be proud, that I have created such book lovers that witholding books could invoke ear-piercing shrieks heard all over the bible belt. (Even worse than pulling a switch off of the tree in your grandmama's backyard. If you know nothing about "pickin' switches" then you are likely a.) not from the south b.) not black,  c.) not related to anyone who is a. or b., or c.) all of the above.)
  • FYI for city-dwellers: Growing up with urban parents who know how to remove a belt in one fell swoop is equivalent to "pickin' switches."
  • If you were unlucky, you had grandparents who had you "pick a switch" and parents who could do the Zorro belt removal. (No problems committing to either back in the day, it seems.)
  • That said, I've decided that book withholding, when fully committed to, can be a solid consequence for naughty behavior. Solid.*
  • *But only if your kids dig books.

Yes. This is what I go through when I leave Grady Hospital.

Oh. And if you don't have any SkippyJon Jones books in your house and you have a child under the age of 5. You need to be on Amazon. Now. Because SkippyJon Jones = good times.



And if you don't have any Shel Silverstein books in your house then. . . .well. . . I. . uhh. . .wait.  I refuse to finish that statement. Surely you have Shel Silverstein in your house. Surely.


 from Silverstein's "Where the Sidewalk Ends."
(Dude, read this to your kids and everyone wins, man.)

Friday, September 10, 2010

Reflections of a Grady Doctor after a Bedtime Story: The Gospel According to Shel Silverstein




"If you are a dreamer come in
If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar
A hoper, a pray-er, a magic-bean-buyer
If you're a pretender come sit by my fire
For we have some flax golden tales to spin
Come in!
Come in!"

~ Shel Silverstein
_____________________________________________________________

I was sitting on the couch with my laptop on my lap, and thinking. . . .I want to write. I need to write. But there's a problem: I have nothing on the tip of my tongue or fingertips to write about. I felt my engine stalling. . . .

(Hmm. . . . could this be the aftermath of me now being 40? Let's hope not.)

I put down the MacBook and decided to wait it out. Vegged out on the couch with the kids watching "Astroboy" on cable. As soon as the credits rolled, I marched them to their bedroom.

"Just one book, pu-leeeeease?"

I thought of my friend and fellow Grady doctor, Lesley M., who agreed with her husband that they'd never say no to a request for a book to be read--an agreement that I also adopted. (Eh hem. . ."never" sounded like a good idea at the time, Lesley and Rich. . . . ) So anyways. . . .tonight, I broke out "The Giving Tree" by Shel Silverstein. The book is part sullen/part deep/part thought-provoking/part sleep-inducing. (And okay, just a wee bit depressing. . .but depressing in a good way. . . ) Anyways. . .it held the kids captive as always.


". . .and the tree was happy."

I snapped the book shut in an unspoken "The End."

"Read it again!"

"Yeah, Mom, puleeeeaaaase?"

"No, you little coco-pugs. Bedtime."


Once I finally got them settled in/tucked in, I found myself reflecting on the book we'd just read, and I thought about how much of my childhood was punctuated by Shel Silverstein's writings.

Hmmm.


Turns out that Shel was a pretty insightful dude. Next thing I knew I was looking through some of his classic children's poems and stories and. . .

Ah hah.


A "light in the attic" came on. . .just like that. Something to write about indeed. Why? Oh it's simple. Life as a Grady doctor totally overlaps with the gospel according to Shel Silverstein. Totally.

Wait.

Before I go on--could you possibly be one of those rare people who didn't grow up on Shel Silverstein masterpieces such as "Where the Sidewalk Ends" and "Lafcadio?" I will give the disclaimer that my mother is a retired elementary school teacher AND a ridiculously avid reader of all things literary. . . .but I'm saying. . .didn't everyone grow up being mesmerized by the late Shel Silverstein and his grainy black and white illustrations? If you, by some strange chance, did not then please excuse me while I turn my back, clutch my chest and . . .

::GASP::

Seriously? Seriously. A childhood without Shel Silverstein is a questionable childhood at best. (No offense to yours.)

Alright. . .so where was I? Oh yeah, the gospel according to Silverstein. Care to join?

*(All of the following quotes are the works of Shel Silverstein.)

***

"How many slams in an old screen door?
Depends how loud you shut it.
How many slices in a bread?
Depends how thin you cut it.
How much good inside a day?
Depends how good you live 'em.
How much love inside a friend?
Depends how much you give 'em."


Going in circles. . . .


There was this patient I had once who goes down in history as one of my most memorable Grady elders ever. No matter what I asked him, he had some circuitous comeback or pontificating response that never quite qualified as an answer. I thought my questions were simple enough, but I'd find myself in this crazy loop of Mr. Miyagi commentary that never seemed to have a real endpoint. Now y'all know how much I respect the Grady elders, so it's not like I could just throw my hands up and say, "Would you just answer the question already?!?" Instead, I just had to endure. . . .

"Hey there, sir. How are you feelin' this morning?"

"I'm still kickin' just not high, doctor."

"Oh. . .okay. Are you alright today?"

"Oh, now I'm always gon' be alright, now. 'Cawse I know a man who died on a cross and rose on the thoid day. . ."

"Yes, sir." (Grady rule #1: Never interrupt any Grady elder who makes reference to any part of the Holy Trinity.) I pause and wait for him to finish. "Soooo. . . .how are you doing, sir?"

"I don't know, doc. I ain't no count." Starts rubbing his abdomen. Belches.

"Uhhh, okay." (No count = not good or not well. Thanks, Dad for teaching me such lingo.) "Is your stomach hurting?"

"Sometimes it boils on me, but tha's okay. 'Cawse I ain't no ways tired."

"Yes, sir." ("No ways tired" = words in an old Negro spiritual. Grady rule #2: Old spirituals are also not to be interrupted.) I wait a few beats before asking again, "Sir, I'm just trying to get an idea of how you're feeling today. .to make sure I'm not missing anything. . . so your belly. . .how is it compared to yesterday?"

"Every day that I wek up and see a new day is better than yesterday. You see, 'cawse I know a man. . . " ("I know a man" = Elder reference to Jesus. Back to Grady rule #1.)

This cryptic circuit went on every morning for two full weeks for, like, thirty minutes an encounter. To this day, I'm still not sure whether or not he felt bad or good. Seriously, it was never clear to me. Either way, I came to enjoy our morning chats, even if I had no idea what to chart afterward.

***
"I cannot go to school today"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
"I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.

My mouth is wet, my throat is dry.
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox.
And there's one more - that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?

My leg is cut, my eyes are blue,
It might be the instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke.
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in.


My back is wrenched,
my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My toes are cold, my toes are numb,
I have a sliver in my thumb. My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,

I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There's a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is ...
What? What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is .............. Saturday?

G'bye, I'm going out to play!"

Mourning sickness. . . . .


There was once this resident rotating with me on wards who was about 15 weeks pregnant. She confided in me early in her pregnancy, and also did not hesitate to let me know how obstructive pregnancy was to anything more than the most basic patient care. (She didn't seem impressed by the two pregnancies I worked through on wards. . .)

Me: "How 'bout you give us a lecture on hyponatremia?"

Her: "Oh, my legs get tired when I stand at the board."

Me: "You can sit if you'd like."

Her: "But I get out of breath from all that talking."

Me: "Okay, then you can just make us a handout."

Her: "I have terrible carpal tunnel already."

Me: "Uhhh, okay."

Her: "Hey, Dr. Manning?"

Me: "Yes?"

Her: "Don't forget I have Saturday off. . . ."

Me: "Yes, I remember. Is everything okay?"

"Oh, yeah! I'm doing a triathlon!"

Um yeah.

****

"There is a voice inside of you
That whispers all day long,
'I feel this is right for me,
I know that this is wrong.'
No teacher, preacher, parent, friend
Or wise man can decide
What's right for you--just listen to
The voice that speaks inside."

The Hard Choices. . . . .

I was once talking to one of my most favorite former-Grady-doctors ever. She was struggling with a decision to continue working at Grady, or take a different job. Now y'all know how much I love me some Grady Hospital--but the job opportunity in question seemed like a really great fit for her. She was so conflicted! I sat and listened as she rattled off all the pros and cons of each. As badly as I wanted her to stay and be a Grady doctor with me, it really sounded like her decision was already made before she even knew it.

"But I don't know what to do," she said tearfully. "I love Grady, but. . ."

"Listen to your spirit," I replied. "What's your spirit telling you?"

She started crying. Hard. I just sat there watching her from the other side of my desk. Hunched over with her face in her hands, weeping.

"There's your answer, and don't worry. It's always hard to say goodbye to someone or something you love. Just know that more love awaits you."

Just know that more love awaits you? Whew. I have no idea where all that Jedi Master deep-ness came from, but thank goodness it came when it did. Too bad I wasn't on a Shel Silverstein kick. I could have just whipped out "Where the Sidewalk Ends" and had her read that poem. See? I'm saying. Shel was dope.

***
"Sandra’s seen a leprechaun,
Eddie touched a troll,
Laurie danced with witches once,
Charlie found some goblins gold.
Donald heard a mermaid sing,
Susy spied an elf,
But all the magic I have known
I've had to make myself."

Magic in the hospital. . . .

When I was a medical student, I never seemed to be the one that ever saw the exotic cases of anything. Nobody ever seemed to seize in front of me or exsanguinate before my beady little eyes. Every heart murmur I heard was an "innocent" one and even when I thought a patient had a mass in the roof of his mouth one day, even that turned out to be a "normal variant." Dang.

One day in the cafeteria, third year medicine clerkship circa 1994:

"I admitted a lady with acute intermittent porphyria last night!"

"Oh yeah? Well, I helped code a man in heart failure from wet Beri-Beri!"

"What did you see, Kim?"

"Errrr. . . .I saw a lady who ate at the all-you-can-eat shrimp feast at Cap'n D's and got the gouch in her big toe."

::crickets::

(Okay. . .although seeing gout (a.k.a. "the gouch") is not like seeing a leprechuan, I've since learned that since common things are common, seeing all of those "bread and butter" cases in med school was a good thing.)

***

"Tell me I'm clever,
Tell me I'm kind,
Tell me I'm talented,
Tell me I'm cute,
Tell me I'm sensitive,
Graceful and Wise
Tell me I'm perfect--
But tell me the TRUTH."

Feedback. . . . .

(This is what I'm subconsciously thinking when I solicit feedback from my husband . . .and from your blog comments. . . .hee hee. . . .wait, did I just say that?)

****

"Said the little boy, "Sometimes I drop my spoon."

Said the old man, "I do that too."

The little boy whispered, "I wet my pants."

I do that too," laughed the little old man.

Said the little boy, "I often cry."

The old man nodded, "So do I."

But worst of all," said the boy, "it seems

Grown-ups don't pay attention to me."

And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.

I know what you mean," said the little old man."

Kindred spirits. . . . . . .

This little ditty reminds me of why it's so beautiful to have medical students in the hospital. They have the most time to give, and their undivided attention can be such a blessing to sick patients. I remember being completely ignored by my attending during my 3rd year clerkship in Internal Medicine--so much so, that I was convinced that I would never, ever do Medicine. I initially thought I'd be a surgeon. . . . .until I discovered that I loved the post-op patients and consults on the surgical service, but not the OR. (Turns out that you need to like the OR if you want to do Surgery. . .picky, picky!)

I later learned that even though some of my attendings back then wouldn't know me if I walked up and smacked them across the face. . . .my patients knew me and appreciated my presence. Sometimes the patient and the medical student have more in common than they realize. I tell the students of how pivotal their role is to scared patients. I also tell them that you need that patient just as much as that patient needs you.

****
It was missing a piece.
And it was not happy.
So it set off in search
of its missing piece.
And as it rolled
it sang this song - "Oh I'm lookin' for my missin' piece
I'm lookin' for my missin' piece
Hi-dee-ho, here I go,
Lookin' for my missin' piece."

A perfect fit. . . . .

This book by Shel Silverstein-- "The Missing Piece"-- makes me think of my life before Harry and the boys. I can't say that I was really unhappy, per se--but something was missing. The ending of the book makes me happy because it reminds me of when I first met Harry. I guess the way I remember it is kind of like this. . . . I was just a-singing and a-rolling along like the circle missing the piece. Hi-dee-ho, here I go. So glad I found my missin' pieces!

Found: my pieces that I love to pieces

***
"Would you like to hear
of the terrible night
when I bravely fought the---
No?
Alright."

The late night storyteller. . . . .


Bwwah hah hah! This essentially describes one of the reasons I started this blog in the first place. Harry a.k.a. "the person who originally had to hear every one of my Grady reflections before this blog." My poor, poor husband. He'd lay in bed at night listening to me rambling on and on with my intricately detailed Grady tales. . . . .

"And then, you won't believe what happened next, babe!"

Snort. "Uh. . . huh? I can't believe that, babe."

"I didn't say anything yet, Harry." Snort.

Snort. That was the sound of Harry dozing off with the tiny snore that he would swear up and down was not, do you hear me? Not a snore but a wide awake snort.

"I'm listening, babe. I am listening."

"Okay, well then. . the nurse comes up to me and my team and says. . " Snort.


Starting this blog sort of let Harry off of the hook. Sort of. (Okay, I do still tell him quite a few of my stories, and okay I admit, sometimes make him listen to me read him my blog posts aloud. . . .)

So on behalf of Harry and me-- thank you for reading. . . .and for coming in and sitting by my fire. For truly, my friend, we have some flax golden tales to spin indeed. :)

***
If you didn't (gasp) grow up on Shel Silverstein. . . .and even if you don't have children. . . .please. . .
don't go another day without the gospel according to Silverstein. . . .